Websites on which you don't want to appear

I am watching "Talkshow With Spike Feresten" because, well, the remote is really far away, and right after the bit where they gave a 99-year-old woman a set of tramp stamps (aka the "license plate" tattoos in the center of the back just above the waistline), Spike discussed an issue plaguing bad-haired, bad-skinned, oft-bespectacled aging male has-been or wanna-be celebrities everywhere.

You see, gone are the days of any-pub-is-good-pub. Nowadays the Internet opens up "pub" opportunities that can be unflattering to the point of painfulness. Outer-tier celebrities such as former Saturday Night Live star Dana Carvey, Spike Feresten, the loud half of Penn and Teller Penn Gilette, sodomite satirist Oscar Wilde, seventeenth-century English philosopher John Locke, Senator-elect-ish Al Franken, and alleged best friend of and political mastermind behind President Obama William Ayers have all been the subjects of this very type of Internet attack.

Yes, they have all been featured on MenWhoLookLikeOldLesbians.com, a website dedicated to exposing men who look like old lesbians.

Interestingly enough, three guys on the site (Spike, Dana, and Penn) were all on the show this night. So they did what any group of guys facing the public scorn of looking like aging homosexual women would do ... they sang a song about it.

Let's face it; nothing restores one's masculinity more than breaking into a musical number.